Dating · Thoughts about sex

How to get a bisexual woman

You’d think that as a woman I’d have some insight on dating other women. Some built in knowledge about how the female brain works. Sadly I do not. Chicks are hard to date.

There’s a woman I’ve dated sort of off and on since Feb. Things started off in a weird way with us. We initially connected over some shared situations. She seemed like she needed a friend. I could relate to what she was going through, so I offered a shoulder. Not expecting to date her. But that’s what happened.

So we dated for a bit. Until things in her life started to get sticky and she needed to pay attention to those things and so we broke up. Or, I thought we broke up. Then she started coming around again. Calling me her girlfriend again. Thus began the cycle. She gets close for a bit then disappears. Then she pops back up again. Like yesterday. I haven’t heard from her in weeks and yesterday she sends me a text because she was stuck someplace and bored.

I would be completely fine with it if all she wanted to be was a fuck buddy. Then I wouldn’t mind the occasional call. Because the boundaries seem a little clearer when sex is the only thing on the table. But she seems to want the shoulder to cry on as well as the sex. To be honest, I have enough stuff going on in my life. I don’t have the energy to be a sounding board for someone who only wants to come around when it is convenient for her. Even if she is tall and gorgeous and a great kisser.

Then there was a complete shocker of an email in my in-box this morning. A woman who I’ve known for well over a year is interested in me. She’s not been with a woman. She keeps her bi-curious tendencies under wraps. She’s a wonderful woman. I like her a lot. I’d be happy to get to know her better and see where things could go.

Except that instead of emailing me herself, it was a mutual friend that sent the email. Because she is shy about making the first move with another woman. So as flattered as I am that she’s interested, at the same time it feels a little like high school. I’m not sure exactly how to respond to her. “So hey, I hear you’re interested, wanna fuck?” Really? Not to mention I know that the mutual friend will be asking for reports as to how this has progressed and then you get the sensation of being under a microscope and oy vey.

I love women. Don’t get me wrong. But men are so much easier to date. The fool proof formula for a man = be low maintenance and put out. I can do that in my sleep. That’s my preferred speed. But I like women way too much to give up on them. I just wish they were easier to date.


3 thoughts on “How to get a bisexual woman

  1. I can relate to this post so much. I myself have also been in similar kind of situation and oh boy, was that frustrating. It’s true: when people tell me that I got it easy while I’m able to be with the same gender so I can understand their needs so well, I frown.

    Like, it’s not completely true: they seem to forget that people are individuals and even though you date the same gender, it doesn’t mean that you’re molded the same. Even us women find other women hard to understand.

    And even though I don’t know if it’s much easier to date men but oh boy, does it get a load of your shoulder without the all the temperamental whims of a fellow women 😀

    Anyway (got sidetracked XD), Great blog you have here <3!


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